Why Limiting Beliefs Have Such a Stranglehold on Your Potential
(Part 1 of 3) Despite Doing All the “Things”, You’re Still Stuck
You’ve known for a while that your corporate job is not fulfilling. Something is missing.
You’ve taken some steps to create what’s next. You’ve researched options. You’ve been working on your mindset – thinking mantras and positive thoughts to take action toward what’s next. You know you can leave this career. You know you deserve what’s next.
Yet it still isn’t happening. You can’t put your finger on what’s stopping you. And without knowing what’s stopping you, you feel powerless to change it. It’s like a hidden, invisible barrier.
It isn’t just in your head.
Did you know that you can’t necessarily eliminate old, limiting beliefs simply by thinking positive new thoughts? Despite repeating them, and even getting yourself into the emotions and feelings of them, you can still find yourself stuck because the old beliefs still have a stranglehold on you.
They aren’t just thoughts. It goes deeper.
Beliefs that stop you from taking action on what you really want now in your life formed prior to age seven. They arose out of experiences that your very young mind interpreted as threats to your survival. This is natural for everyone, and is based on the way your mind and brain develop.
First, let’s look at an example of this.
Perhaps you went shopping with your parents when you were about 4. You saw something fragile and beautiful in the store. It made your heart light up, and you just HAD to pick it up and look at it. As you reached for it, your mom yelled for you to stop, reached for your hand, and pulled you away. She very sternly reminded you never to touch anything in the store, without explanation.
At this early age, you hadn’t yet developed the ability to understand the bigger picture. In your mind, you saw something beautiful that lit up your heart, and you reached for it. And, one of the important people upon whom you rely for food, love, and shelter has just gotten upset with you. You know instinctively that she won’t provide for your needs if she withdraws from you. You know you need to keep her happy and present. So, you modify your behavior by walking away from that bright shiny object that has your heart.
And, mom seems happy.
Problem solved. Or is it?
What else happened here?
You instinctively made a Note to Self: “I don’t deserve the bright shiny thing my heart wants. I know this because mom got upset with me and didn’t let me have it. To keep mom happy and providing for me, DON’T reach for bright shiny things my heart wants”.
This is just one simple example of the myriad of such experiences that create beliefs that limit how we approach the world and what we want. Follow along tomorrow in Part 2 – The Hidden Key To Your Invisible Barrier. I’ll show you what the key to this invisible barrier is, and how to start moving through it to what’s next for you.
(Part 2 of 3) The hidden key to your invisible barrier….
You felt stressed. This is because you were worried on a subconscious level that your supply chain mom was going to cut you off. Cut off = you won’t survive.
At that age, your mind didn’t have the ability to know any better. You responded very instinctively.
And, your bodily stress responses were triggered. This means your glands, organs, and tissues responded to “fight, flee, or freeze” to help you manage the situation. This even included some tissue tension.
Why is that important?
Your subconscious linked this stress response to your “Note to Self” belief that you don’t deserve what your heart wants. This link becomes anchored in you as a protective, reflexive operating program embedded in your harddrive. It will stop you whenever a similar threat presents.
And, what’s a similar threat? Reaching for your heart’s desire, whether it’s another shiny object in a store, or making YOUR YOU-nique difference in the world. That little girl inside still believes she doesn’t deserve it, even when the adult woman knows better.
This is one of many possible “formative” experiences that created an intricate pattern of limiting beliefs woven into the fabric of your being.
Why do limiting beliefs have such a stranglehold on your potential?
Your subconscious mind’s job is very primitive: your survival. It cares ZIP about your quality of life.
When that “safety system” evolved, tigers were a real threat. The world was simple.
The world is different now. Humans are different now. Today, there are many more situations interpreted as “threats to survival”.
This system has evolved from a simple fact: humans are dependent upon others for their basic needs (food, shelter, love) far longer than other mammals. Instinctively you know from Day 1 not to piss off or disappoint your supply chain and, thus, lose the support you need.
When it seems your “suppliers” are withdrawing or rejecting you with a “NO”, you essentially think, “I’m unworthy”, or “I’m unlovable”. Your subconscious then seeks to make you loveable and worthy by modifying your behavior, thus restoring your vital support.
(Part 3 of 3) And, without even realizing it, you’ve learned to “should” yourself.
You learned what you “should” do, and how you “should” be, to maintain your supply chain. And, pretty much by age 7, you’ve developed a set of core survival-related beliefs, upon which a pile of even more limiting beliefs grew. All at the potential expense of your quality of life in favor of surviving.
You should be seen and not heard, share, wait your turn, work hard, make do, please people, do what you’re told, etc. Sound familiar?
Because your subconscious mind knows SO well what… uh… works, it naturally resists change. Attempts to change your mindset, and your life, such as with a mantra, “I DO deserve my heart’s desire”, can therefore be sabotaged. Your subconscious still won’t let you risk upsetting your supply chain by reaching for your heart’s desire.
And, unless you are very self aware, you won’t even realize what’s happening. Remember, those beliefs are anchored in you with intricate patterns that go beyond your conscious mind. Drumroll… #invisiblebarriertochange.
How else do limiting beliefs show up?
Are you overwhelmed, unclear, procrastinating, justifying, indecisive, and/or tolerating the same dissatisfying patterns? Do you find you lack money, time, or resources for what it is you say you want? All ways limiting beliefs can stop you. They can keep you from prioritizing what you want because you don’t value…. YOU. They can paralyze you in fear.
And, this creates stress. It begins in your body as symptoms, which can become health issues over time.
You can’t simply “think” your way around limiting beliefs. You have to resolve them holistically, from their energy field pattern origins into their anchoring bodily patterns.
(I’ve written several previous blog posts on this general topic, but you may find these good additional resources: “Live an Extraordinary Life – It Is Your Design” or “Stressed? In Pain? Unhappy? Answer Your Call.”)
As a trained professional, I help you unwind those limiting patterns, create, and embody new ones. I hold the space for your process to evolve and unfold naturally. This gives you confidence, clarity, and direction in taking your next steps to living ON-Purpose, making your YOU-nique difference in the world.
Is it time to release the stranglehold on your potential?
If you’re ready to spend a high-touch, intensive 6 months in a custom 1:1 transformational coaching program to:
- be brutally honest about the thoughts you’re ignoring and whispers for more you’re suppressing,
- unwind and release the beliefs limiting you from living your heart’s desire,
- embody a new supportive bodymindset
- discover and BE who you Truly ARE,
- clarify what you REALLY WANT and your next steps to creating it, and
- align mind-body-Soul-Purpose to make your YOU-nique difference in the world
Email me today and inquire about how I may support you. We’ll chat and see if we’re a fit. If so, we can get started as soon as you’re ready.
Uncertain? Get a feel for what it’s like to Sync with Your Creative SoulFULL Self. This is a method I’ve created to help you take your first steps toward getting out of your analytical mind and begin to connect with your creative Soul.